Part 7

Chapter Nine

Chakotay and Kathryn took a couple of minutes together before the briefing. It was her turn to receive some reassurances that somehow this awful situation would work out. She had taken the time alone to consider the PD issues and honestly look at her own actions with Sidri. She wasn't proud of them in retrospect. Now in Chakotay's arms she tried to absorb his sheer physical strength hoping it would help her face the crew, and especially Tuvok. Some days she truly hated her position.

"So now that all of you have had the chance to review the transmission, I'm sure you want to know what happened between Sidri and myself. Before I get to that, let me say the reason I want feedback is that there are clear Prime Directive issues involved. In retrospect, I'm afraid I didn't consider them carefully enough." Kathryn gave a brief summary of her conversations, as well as an explanation of what Sidri saw with the hidden camera.

Tuvok, of course, was the first one to speak. "Captain, while it is true that given the Prime Directive, the wisest course of action would have been to share nothing with the praetor's wife. However, as we were unaware of the camera, the effect of her watching you and the Commander is not our responsibility. It is unclear what she would have done if no conversation had taken place."

"True, Mr. Tuvok. But I don't think that lets me off the hook, since I fueled the fire."

B'Elanna jumped in. "I don't claim to be an expert on PD issues, but I have to say what this situation reminds me of. The political and social movement of women on Earth during the latter part of the 20th century. Just the way the praetor is so incensed that Sidri is planning on talking to her friends about what she's thinking and feeling - that's exactly what happened to Earth women centuries ago. My only point, Captain, is that perhaps Mr. Tuvok is right. Perhaps all societies who oppress one sex eventually have to face the consequences of that oppression. It's quite likely that Sidri would have acted whether she talked to you or not."

"Yes, B'Elanna, but perhaps the very fact that she is a woman is why I didn't think of the PD. My feelings of kinship with her clouded my judgment. She was coming to me as another woman, who was experiencing things foreign to her."

Chakotay said quietly, "The crone."

"What do you mean?"

"In more primitive societies, there is the tradition of elder women, or women with more experience, passing their wisdom on to the younger, more naive ones. It is a female rite of passage experience. Some oral traditions translate this to the tales of the crone, a wise female figure who has certain magical powers and uses her wisdom to help others. Variations on this theme are in all cultures up until the advent of Christianity. My point being that perhaps the role you found yourself in was part of your genetic memory. I tend to agree with Tuvok. I don't know that what you said exactly was more influential than what she saw. I'm basing that partly on the way she reacted when I spoke to her at the Council House. It seemed to me that she already had some sort of emotional reaction to me prior to us speaking."

"That's true, Chakotay, remember what she said? She felt an unexpected sadness seeing us. But to take both of your points into consideration, it appears as though Sidri is possibly starting an early feminist movement here. And it looks like we were a certain catalyst."

B'Elanna was shaking her head. "Captain, you don't know that's what Sidri is going to do, or even whether a 'movement' will happen on this planet."

"Isn't the question here really whether or not it is right to interfere with Sidri's thought processes now?" Harry once more was getting straight to the point. Tom was nodding his head.

"I agree with Harry. Captain, whether or not you and the Commander raised some issues in Sidri's marriage is almost irrevelant and I don't think any of us will ever be able to figure out where the line was."

"Well, I must say I am surprised. Maybe it's just my guilty conscience speaking, but I expected you all to tell me that I violated the Prime Directive here. Neelix, Seven, do you have anything to say?"

Neelix had been looking down at his finger making circles on the table top. "I don't know that I have sufficient background to make a judgment about the Prime Directive. And after spending time with the ambassador, listening to his yearnings for life outside the Kadi structure, I tend to think that perhaps this society is not as closed as they want us to believe. It sounds to me as though the bottom line is that Sidri was unhappy with her life. You and the Commander may have been a catalyst, as you put it, but she would still be unhappy whether we came here or not. Who's to say that just seeing you at the reception, Captain, being a woman in a position of authority wouldn't have caused her to think? I am more concerned with the high praetor, frankly. I think he could potentially be dangerous."

"I think you may be right about one thing, Neelix. This society has many more undercurrents than we thought starting this trade agreement. And the high praetor being dangerous is something I'll not argue. Seven, you've been awfully quiet, what do you think about this situation?"

"I'm not certain what to think about it, Captain. The intricacies of the life and feelings of the high praetor's wife I believe are beyond my experience to understand. After viewing the transmission, however, I agree with Neelix. This man has the potential to be dangerous, to you personally, to the Commander personally and to the ship itself."

Kathryn stole a glance at Chakotay who was sitting to her left. He was, again, clenching and unclenching his hands, taking a few deep breaths. She then looked at Tuvok, who spoke upon meeting her eyes.

"Captain. I think we should consider the possibility that doing nothing could be worse than taking the action of speaking with Sidri. Although I do believe the high praetor is something of a spiritual leader and thus more prone to non-violence than violence, men of his standing have been known to lose control if they feel threatened sufficiently. However inadvertently, we have threatened him."

Kathryn stood up and began her usual pacing. "But how in the world and in good conscience can I do what he wants? Tell Sidri that everything we talked about was a lie? She will know I'm not being honest, she's not stupid. And ultimately it isn't going to matter what I say or don't say to her. She won't listen to me, she's not going to come back to her husband because of something I say to her. There isn't any way to make the high praetor happy in this situation. Is there? Am I missing something?"

Chakotay chuckled mirthlessly, staring at his hands. "I could just kill him and put him out of his misery. It might make me feel better, too, if only for a moment." He raised his eyes. "Just kidding, everyone, honestly."

B'Elanna, sitting next to him, patted his shoulder. "Kidding or not, we completely understand how you feel, Chakotay. I, for one, am mighty glad I wasn't on the bridge during this little fun fest. I don't know if I could have contained my Klingon half sufficiently hearing him threaten you and the Captain. He's a pig." Chakotay turned to her and gave her a small but grateful smile, which she returned.

"Well, I have two ideas." Harry spoke up. "What about Mr. Drkaya? Does he have any influence over the high praetor?"

"The other?"

"Talk to Sidri before the 24 hours is up, tell her what's happened, ask her what she thinks would be the best course of action. Perhaps, again, Mr. Drkaya might be able to find her."

Kathryn stopped pacing. "I hate to think about bringing any more people from the planet into this situation. Though the ambassador's help was wonderful... At least we can give it a try, and if it gets us nowhere, then ... Maybe we won't exactly follow the Commander's idea, but we could consider putting the high praetor in the ring with him? That could be fun to see..." She noticed the shocked looks of her crew and held up her hands. "Just kidding! I'm allowed a few revenge fantasies of my own you know. I'd like to kill him for that nightgown alone..." At that Chakotay started laughing, he couldn't help himself. She took one look at him and lost control as well. The tension of the room relieved, B'Elanna wanted gown details which Kathryn colorfully provided. She received many sympathetic noises in return and Tom even called it cruel and unusual punishment.

Finally Kathryn called the meeting. "Harry's suggestions are worth a try. Keep thinking about this situation people, as we may be meeting back here later today. Thank you all for your invaluable input and an interesting discussion. Dismissed. Mr. Tuvok, Commander, all three of us will meet at 1300 hours to plan some strategy."
 

Part 8
 

Chapter Ten

With just about an hour before the strategy session, Chakotay and Kathryn dashed to the mess hall for a quick bit of lunch. Whispering together in the corner of the room, she told him that she was feeling desperate to subdue the soreness of her vagina because it was just too distracting, for more than just painful reasons. She needed a completely clear focus for the second meeting.

"I have an idea, Chakotay. Two words: dermal regenerator. I think that might work. I'm going to see the Doctor now."

"You're going to let him do it?" Chakotay was a bit horrified.

"No, I don't think I could handle that. I'm going to replicate myself a regenerator and ask him for instructions, then take it to my quarters and try to do it. Don't know if I can manage it. Would you help if I need it?"

"Of course..." But Chakotay's mind was getting distracted by the pictures forming. He suddenly realized this could be difficult.

"Thank you, honey. I'll call you over the comm... We'll have to have a code word or something... Plan B? No, I'll just say 'beta', okay?"

"Excuse me, I didn't hear anything after you called me 'honey'." Chakotay's eyes looked moist. Kathryn's heart melted.

"If I need your help, I'll call you on the comm and say the word 'beta'..."

"And I'll come running." He grinned.

"Yes, something like that." She grinned back, desperately longing to kiss him. She got up. "I'm going to sick bay. See you later, honey."

"I'll go relieve Tuvok so he can eat. And tell him to hurry. Love you."

As they both left in opposite directions, crewmembers at nearby tables speculated amongst themselves. They had never heard less from the command team, the whispering was so soft no words were distinguishable. Very odd...

"Good afternoon, Captain, what can I do for you?" Luckily there was no one else in sick bay.

Kathryn suddenly hesitated, embarrassed. Damn it, she was the Captain. "Doctor, I need you to give me another quick lesson on the dermal regenerator."

He pursed his lips and looked down at her. "I believe you are already familiar with that piece of equipment. Have you forgotten?"

"Well, I need to know how to repair a particular type of tissue, not from cuts or even bruises, just from irritation. Vaginal tissue." There, she said it.

The Doctor raised his eyebrows at her. "I see. And how long has this irritation been bothering you? Is there any chance it is an infection?" He took out his tri-corder and started to scan the lower half of her body. "No, it doesn't appear to be that. So you and the Commander have been having sexual intercourse?"

Kathryn tried her death glare on him which had no effect. "And why do you assume it is the Commander?"

"Captain, give me a little credit for my powers of observation. I remember what happened when we were in chaotic space, among the many other times one or the other of you has been laid up here. Well, I think you and the Commander make an excellent match and you have my complete support. One question, though. Do you love him?"

"Absolutely, completely, passionately. We have your discretion, I trust?"

"Doctor - patient confidentiality rules apply at all times, you know that. I'm happy to hear you have finally admitted your feelings, treating the Commander's periodic depression was becoming rather... difficult. So, back to the dermal regenerator question..."

With her replicated regenerator stuffed inside her jacket, Kathryn dashed back to her quarters, stripped off everything below the waist and tried to find some relief. Unfortunately, she wasn't able to see enough, even with putting herself in front of the mirror. Shit.

"Janeway to Commander Chakotay." Was heard on the bridge.

"Yes, Captain?"

"Beta." Chakotay fairly lept out of his seat.

"I'm on my way." He tapped his comm, and as he dashed to the lift gave Tuvok command again.

Tom turned to Harry. "Beta?"

Harry shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe B'Elanna can find out."

Tuvok interrupted them. "And maybe the two of you should not speculate on it."

Tom swiveled another half turn. "You mean to tell me, Mr. Tuvok, that you are not the least bit curious as to what that was all about? Beta? Why not alpha?"

"Mr. Paris, I am certain that the Captain and the Commander have some plan they are working on involving the present situation with the Kadi. To speculate that there is more to it is an excercise in futility."

Tom turned back to the helm, shaking his head. Really, Vulcans can be so dense... Beta?

Chakotay entered Kathryn's bedroom to find her sitting on the end of her bed cross-legged, naked from the waist down, playing with the regenerator in the air. She was grinning crookedly at him.

"Couldn't do it. Tried and tried, but I just can't see enough. Come on in! I'm not going to bite..." Chakotay was standing just inside the door, one hand on his hip, the other tugging his ear, shaking his head gently.

"I think this is a bad idea, Kathryn. I don't think I can. Come any closer. This isn't going to work..."

"Chakotay, what's wrong?"

"What's wrong?! Let me see, you are the woman I lust after and I'm supposed to be able to first of all look at you with only half of your uniform on, then have you spread your legs for me while I try to open your vagina to run a long pointy instrument in front of it?! And then go back to work 10 minutes later?? And you ask me what's wrong? I should never have agreed to this..." He muttered to himself.

Kathryn started to laugh. He glared at her. She laughed harder, trying to explain herself. "Really, I'm not laughing at you, I'm not. It's just the look on your face... Like you're about to be put on the rack or something... I'm sorry, it's okay, you don't have to help me if you can't handle it, I understand."

"Are you trying to goad me into this by saying I can't handle it?"

"Chakotay, I'm shocked you would even think such a thing..." She grinned.

"Gods above, woman, what I do for you. Lie down." He said resignedly. "Just don't expect me to be able to jump up and head for the bridge without a cold shower..." He was muttering again.

Still chuckling, Kathryn lay back down on the bed and put her feet on the edge, knees bent. Chakotay sat cross legged on the floor facing her. She raised herself on her elbows and explained the procedure, how long to run the instrument and on what power setting.

"Okay, I got it. Now you'll need to scoot your butt further toward me, Kath, that's good. Hey, maybe I can get into this, I don't get to order you around much... Spread 'em." He started laughing to himself. "Definitely don't get to say that normally, huh?" Kathryn was laughing with him. Really, she thought to herself, what other lover would have ever done this for me?

"You are amazing, do you know that, Chakotay?"

"I've heard that rumor..." He put his hand on her to part her lips and her body responded involuntarily. She gasped to herself. Uh oh. Maybe this isn't such a good idea... She let her upper half fall back and tried to think of plasma relays.

"You really are red, though still quite breath-taking I must say..." His hand was doing nothing untoward, but every touch was driving her to distraction. "Okay, I'm going to start the thing, on the left side first..." She felt a warm tingling sensation. Plasma relays, warp conduits, backup systems...

"I think we'd better hurry..." She managed to say in a clearer voice than she expected.

"Did you say something..." His finger tips just wouldn't keep still. "Okay, that side looks good, any way to tell how it feels, sweetie?" She groaned silently. "No, I guess not unless we have some fun... All right I'm going to work on your right side now." The tingling started up again.

Shit. Species 8472, the Borg Queen, the Kazon... "Are we almost done yet?" She sounded to herself like she was whining.

"Almost... What's the matter, does it hurt?"

"Not...exactly."

The tingling stopped. "Oh. I see. Hm-m-m." His hand was not moving. "Let me just finish this side, you're almost there... Oops, sorry, bad word choice..." He was talking to himself and the tingling returned. Kathryn closed her eyes and let herself drift, giving up on the distraction which wasn't working anyway. The tingling stopped and she vaguely heard the beep of the regenerator being turned off. Her legs were like jelly, falling open of their own weight. Every nerve was taut below her waist. She was trying to gather herself up off the bed, she had to get moving.

"Computer, give me the time." She heard Chakotay's voice. It sounded husky.

"It is 1250 hours."

"Ten minutes is more than enough..." He muttered to himself. She heard some rustling, a couple of thuds, a zipper and more rustling. Then the bed moved and warm wonderful lips were on hers and she was being pulled up the bed and he was inside her and they were moving together... rocking rocking rocking ... until she floated right off the cliff as he pushed her over the edge, calling her name to come back to him, moaning in her ear...both of them spent.

After a few minutes, she began to return to the land of the living and so did he. She opened her eyes to see his, looking tenderly at her. He leaned in, kissing her softly.

"So, Kathryn, my dearest love, I have two thoughts about this regenerator. One, it works. Two, we should keep it close by the bedside and only use it when we have time to enjoy the foreplay. And I have one thought about you. You are very beautiful and very very loved."

"Yes, I believe I am loved. By an extraordinary man. A beautiful, extraordinary man."

"So have we undone everything we repaired?"

"No, actually, I feel no irritation, just very warm and relaxed. And now I suppose we have to get up and work..."

"I'm afraid so."

She sighed as he pulled away, taking her hands and helping her up. "Coffee..." She said. They quickly washed up and got dressed. After brushing her hair and taking a few deep breaths, Kathryn and Chakotay headed back to the bridge via the mess hall where they picked up a tray with a coffee caraffe, a couple of mugs and some cookies. No one watching them missed the deep smiles they gave each other and the way they drifted together as they walked down the corridors, whispering. They arrived only 8 minutes late, the Captain waving Tuvok into the ready room with the Commander carrying the tray, heading to her desk, leaving the door open. The three sat down to, once again, put their formidable heads together.

Chapter Eleven

At 1400 hours Mr. Drkaya stepped off the transporter pad and was greeted by the Captain and Lt. Com. Tuvok. No dress uniforms this time they had decided. They wanted the meeting to be more on an informal side. The Captain gave him a very quick tour of the ship, showing him the mess hall, the airponics bay, the holodecks where Kathryn picked out a nice and non-threatening beach program to show him, then took him through Engineering and up to the bridge. The meeting was held in the briefing room, again with the door open so that the three top Voyager officers could participate without leaving the bridge, per se.

Neelix had prepared some of the Kadi's favorite tea for Mr. Drkaya, which he seemed to appreciate. One thing that was in the briefing room not usually found there was Kathryn's console, sitting in front of her chair at the head of the table. Chakotay sat immediately to her left, Tuvok to his left. Mr. Drkaya sat to her right. She took a deep breath and started things off.

The tentative trade agreement was hammered out to completion. They had made a joint decision to give a little bit more than originally planned as a subtle, or not so subtle, manipulation. Of course, Kathryn made it appear as though the decision to do so was a reluctant one. Voyager, in turn, received everything it needed. Once everyone was pleased with the outcome, Kathryn brought up the topic of the high praetor.

"Mr. Drkaya, we are wondering if you could provide some insight into Ramlu, the high praetor. We are experiencing some difficulties with him and need a little advice from a person who knows him. Would you be willing to help us out?" She smiled her most charming smile.

"Well, Captain, I don't know what I can really divulge. It is true I have known him for many years, although lately he has kept to himself. But I was under the impression that your difficulties with him were over?"

"Actually, they are not. He has been in contact with me and by extension the Commander here and I'm afraid he has put us in a very delicate position. Were you aware that he and his wife were having some marital problems?"

"Goodness, Captain, I cannot imagine how you would know this."

"He told us. You see, he blames me and he blames the Commander for them."

Drkaya shook his head. "Oh dear. What did he say, if you don't mind me asking?"

"You actually are welcome to see his transmission, I have a recording of it here. However, I feel it's important that I explain something to you before you see it. I'm assuming you want to see it?"

"Yes, I think that would be wise."

"We do, too. Now, Mr. Drkaya, I know you are well aware that our cultures are very different. And just as I trust we did not intentionally violate your cultural taboos, I hope that you can accept our cultural mores as being equally legitimate to us. You see, Commander Chakotay and I have more than a working relationship. And in our culture, it's not necessary for two people who love each other to be married to express their feelings, either physically or verbally. In or out of what you call the marriage bed.

While I was locked up, Ramlu watched us on a hidden camera. The Commander and Mr. Tuvok came to visit me and I became upset. The Commander sat with me on the bed and held me while I cried, to give me some comfort. Sidri saw this and it affected her deeply. She came to see me that night to ask me about my relationship with the Commander. I was honest, but I didn't go into any great detail. So. Ramlu contacted me last night and frankly I chose not to respond, asking him to contact me this morning. This is what happened."

She played the transmission. Drkaya paled as he listened and watched. He sat for a minute when it was over, staring at his hands clasped on the table.

"Captain, Commander, I feel the urge to apologize to you from the people of Kadi. Though I know the high praetor is responsible for his actions, he is clearly out of control at the moment. I don't know what to do. Have you made any decision?"

"We have a non-interference policy that we try to adhere to if at all possible. There is no way I can do what Ramlu is asking, even if there was the slightest possibility that Sidri would listen to me, which frankly I don't believe there is. My entire senior staff and I have discussed this at length and the only decisions made were to talk to you and to try and contact Sidri before the 24 hours is up to get her input. We are stumped otherwise."

Chakotay jumped in. "We are also very concerned at the threatening manner and language the high praetor is using at the moment. We know he has no way to reach us up here, but you can see he has threatened to have your allies come after us. Though our policy is always diplomacy first, we will defend ourselves with whatever it takes if that is our only option."

Kathryn nodded her head to him. "And if we have to leave, we'll do it, whether our trading is completed or not. I won't put the lives of my crew in jeopardy needlessly. So you see, Mr. Drkaya, we have a big problem on our hands."

Drkaya breathed deeply and looked around the table. "There are two things I can promise to do. I believe I know where Sidri is and I will contact her myself to see if she's willing to come up here and speak with you. I will also convene the council to discuss the high praetor. We are somewhat responsible for him. Perhaps there is some action we can take to diffuse this situation. I would have to say that I agree with your assessment of the threat. Under no circumstances would I recommend visiting the planet surface until this matter is cleared up, if it ever is. Again, I apologize profoundly." He stood. "Is there anything else?"

The Captain stood followed by her senior officers. "No, I believe that covers it."

"I will contact you within the hour, likely, at the most two about Sidri."

"Thank you councilman. I'll walk you to the transporter room."

Time waiting for the councilman to contact them was spent in the ready room, going over the stack of padds waiting for action from both the Captain and the Commander. Kathryn felt the need to be kept informed of the crew requests that day, though usually she left this all to Chakotay. They also discussed the possible scenarios of a confrontation with the Kadi allies.

"Chakotay, this whole thing is just so stupid. I'm getting really tired of having enemies pop up out of the woodwork, so to speak. Stupid, stupid, stupid." She was shaking her head, fiddling with a padd. "Sometimes I just wish everyone would leave us alone, damn it ..."

"I agree. You know, Kathryn, you look really tired. Maybe you could close your eyes for a bit?"

She half-grinned at him. "Are we going to have one of those arguments again?"

"You mean the one where I'm trying to get you to take better care of yourself?"

"Yeah, that one."

"Depends upon what you do. Now, if you were to come over here" he patted his lap "and curl up for a few minutes with your eyes closed, then I can safely say I won't argue with you. But if you insist on another cup of coffee and more report reading, then I can pretty much guarantee you a bit of a tussle." He flashed one of his dimples.

"I must be beat, because I don't even have the energy to argue with that offer. Just don't take this as a precedent, okay?" She rose and came around the desk, climbed on his lap and sank into his embrace with her head on his shoulder. "Thank you..."

"I won't tell anyone you gave in, I promise. I overpowered you and you didn't have a choice."

"Okay..." She was fading, and after a few minutes of gently stroking her back, she was asleep on his shoulder. Chakotay was feeling quite pleased with himself. Using his meditation techniques, he allowed himself to take a fifteen minute break from reality.

As he brought himself back to consciousness he realized his leg was totally asleep. Dead. He tried to move Kathryn off it, but he couldn't get her far enough to make a difference and he dearly wanted her to stay sleeping. He knew he could never stand up on one leg and still hold her without waking her up. Damn. He needed some help. Who to call? Tuvok? Would he even be willing to pick her up off his lap? Would Chakotay have to hear about improper behavior in the ready room? Not Tuvok. Harry? Harry would be too intimidated to pick Kathryn up. Tom? Tom was workable, as long as Chakotay could get him to stop smirking.

"Chakotay to Paris" he said as quietly as he could, gently tapping his comm.

"Paris here."

"Tom, come to the ready room."

"On my way."

As the door swooshed shut, Tom was standing next to the chair, looking confused.

"Is the Captain all right? Do you want me to get the tricorder?"

Chakotay put his finger to his lips and spoke softly. "She's fine, Tom. I just need your help. She needs sleep desperately and I can't get her up without waking her. My leg is dead. Would you give me a hand?"

"Boy you scared me for a minute. Sure, what can I do?"

Chakotay was surprised by the answer he was receiving. "Tom, you sure that's you in there? I expected at least one smart remark..." He chuckled. "Sorry - can you take her off my lap without waking her?"

Tom grinned. "I'll hold my smart remark until a later date, when I can use this to my advantage..." He squatted slightly, reached in and got his arms around the Captain, then gently cradling her stood up, grunting slightly.

Chakotay started rubbing his leg vigorously, and gradually he could move his foot. He gingerly stood, still rubbing his thigh, head bent to the task.

"Um-m - Chakotay? I think I need your help now..." He raised his head and chuckled at the sight. Kathryn had put her arms around Tom and was pushing her face into his neck. A blush was creeping across the lieutenant's cheeks.

Chakotay grinned at him. "Don't worry, I won't tell her or B'Elanna. Kathryn's a snuggler. Here, I think I can take her now..." And the sleeping Captain was passed back to her Commander.

"B'El is too. Don't let her know I told you that, though. She'd probably eat my heart for breakfast." Tom followed Chakotay who was heading for the couches. Kathryn now had her arms around his neck, nuzzling him. "These two women are full of contradictions, aren't they?"

Chakotay grunted slightly as he squatted, putting Kathryn down as gently as he could. "Tom, grab that pillow down there.." And as Tom put the pillow under head, Chakotay was trying to extract himself from her embrace. Kathryn was mumbling something. "Sh-h-h, Kath, go back to sleep... I'm right here..." He put her hands on her stomach, she rolled over to face him and mumbled something again. Leaning closer he heard her say "...smelled different..."

Tom grinned. Chakotay, smiling, shook his head. "No, love, I didn't smell any different, you were just dreaming... Go back to sleep, I'll stay here with you." He stroked her hair until she was back under. Then he sat on the floor with his back to the couch and exhaled forcefully, rubbing his eyes.

"Chakotay, are you all right?"

"I have no clear answer to that, Tom. This has been an intense couple of days..." Tom sat on the floor facing him, back against the glass railing.

"How did it got with Mr. Drkaya?"

"Well, we're waiting for him to contact us. He's trying to find Sidri, to see if she'll come up here so we can talk. He's also meeting with the council. He was fairly shocked at Ramlu's behavior."

"I would hope so. I'm with B'El on that one - he's a pig. Equating you with the devil and all. How far off could one man be?"

Chakotay gave Tom a small smile. "Thank you. Here I thought you might find some agreement there..."

"Chakotay! You wound me. My problems with you weren't because I thought you were evil, quite the contrary. I was pretty much in awe of you. And in my twisted way of behavior back then, I translated that into making your life miserable. Past history." Tom was quiet for a minute. "Was that hard for you, Ramlu I mean?"

"Hatred is an emotion I'm trying to live without. It was difficult to feel it again. True confessions? I had a momentary relapse during his tirade. I wished I hadn't given up revenge. If he does anything to harm Kathryn I will be hard to stop. I could probably tear him limb from limb."

"That's not hard to understand. How is she doing, if you don't mind telling me?"

"She's stressed, more so than usual. Great way to start a relationship, huh? We're having a trial by fire, right off the bat. I'm grateful she's still giving us a go. She could have retreated in a flash and she didn't."

"I think she loves you, big guy."

He smiled for the first time. "I've heard that rumor, along with a few others." He laughed to himself. "Well, I guess I'd better get back to report reading..." He pulled himself to his feet, turned and placed a kiss on Kathryn's head. As the two men made their way back toward the desk, Chakotay patted Tom on the shoulder. "Thanks, Tom for your help. And the talk. Can we keep this just between us? I don't think the Captain would want to know that anyone intruded in her space, if you know what I mean."

"No problem. I won't tell anyone, and particularly not a certain Vulcan hard-nose."

"Tuvok has been pretty good about all of this, actually. He helped me out a lot on Kadi when I was itching to storm the batallion. But then again, I couldn't imagine him coming in here and helping out. Just couldn't see it..." He chuckled and Tom joined him.

"Chakotay, can I just ask you one question?"

"Sure."

"What was 'beta'? We're dying to know."

Chakotay chortled. "I'll go to my grave before I tell you. And before you think you understand what that means, trust me, you will never in a trillion years be able to guess what we were up to. Never. So don't even try."

"Well, can I at least assume you had a good time?"

"I am not a man to tell tales. I will say that we had our moments. That's all."

Tom looked at him askance, his wheels turning. "That's all?"

"Yes." Chakotay walked behind the Captain's desk to get himself settled, organizing the rest of the padds, trying not to laugh. He raised his head to meet Tom's stare, a grin playing on the edges of his mouth. "Thanks again, Tom. I think you can go back to the helm now."

"If I challenge you to a pool match, would you tell?"

Chakotay, smiling, shook his head. He silently pointed to the door. Tom turned and left. Chakotay walked to the door controls and opened the ready room door, so he could keep an eye on the bridge. The noises of the ship and its crew quietly talking drifted in. Kathryn slept. He replicated himself a cup of tea and read.
 
Part 9
 

It was about an hour later that Harry called out, "Commander, transmission from the planet surface."

Chakotay walked to the doorway and told him to hail them, then turned and quickly walked to the
replicator for a cup of coffee. Armed with a caffeine supply, he woke Kathryn up, told her about the
hail, handed her the cup and went to the bridge to stall.

"On screen."

This time it was the face of Mr. Drkaya that greeted the bridge.

"Good afternoon, Commander. Is Captain Janeway available?"

"Good afternoon, Mr. Drkaya. She'll be here momentarily. I'm hoping you have some good news for us."

Kathryn joined him. He was glad to see she looked rested and calm.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Drkaya. I second the Commander's hope. Have you found Sidri?"

"Better than that. I have her here with me and she is anxious to speak with you both. But first, I want to give you an update on my discussions with the Council. They are understandably upset at this turn of events, Captain. Unfortunately, I was unable to convince them of the extent of Ramlu's passion. I am wondering if I can have a copy of the transmission? They've agreed to be available in the next hour to see it."

Kathryn turned toward Ops. "Harry, is our data stream compatible with theirs?"

Harry worked his console. "Within one variable parameter, yes. I'll know better how to adjust that after we attempt a transfer."

"Councilman, do you have a technician there who can assist on your end?"

He turned his head off-screen, then back. "Yes."

"Go ahead, Harry."

Voyager's computer made the usual beeps.

"Captain, adjusting the modulation frequency. Transferring again." Harry studied his console. "It's still not working."

"Mr. Drkaya, does your technician have any ideas?"

"I'm afraid, Captain, that your technology is too advanced for us. We will have to come up there and see it on your ship."

Kathryn looked at Chakotay. Damn they said to each other. Is this ever going to be over?

"All right. How soon can you gather everyone together?"

"As quickly as I can. In the meantime, Sidri is willing to visit you immediately, if that is convenient with you."

"Of course. Please tell her I will meet her in the transporter room. Five minutes?"

"Fine, Captain. I will notify you very soon about the Council's visit."

"Likely you will speak with Lt. Commander Tuvok."

"Thank you Captain, Commander."

The screen went blank.

Kathryn sighed. She told Tuvok that she and Chakotay would meet with Sidri alone and asked him to handle the Council's visit. If Sidri was still here, Tuvok would be the only Voyager contact they had. She could tell that he was not particularly happy with this, and likely she was the only one on the bridge who could tell that. She wasn't happy either. She longed to be in her quarters, having a candlelit dinner with the man she loved, curling up together in her bed, watching the stars...

"Captain? Are you all right?" Chakotay spoke quietly to her.

Kathryn sighed again. "Yes, I am. Would you get the ready room prepared? Take one of the chairs up to the couch, call Neelix and order some tea, straighten up the desk a bit? I'll go meet Sidri." She touched his arm. "Thank you, Chakotay. For the break." She finally smiled. He returned it. She headed for transporter room two.

Chapter Twelve

Sidri looked nervous. Sitting on the couch next to Kathryn, she was twisting her hands over and over again. She appeared to be grateful for the tea, but the cup sat untouched on the table. Chakotay was beginning to wonder if he should leave.

"Sidri, would you be more comfortable if you were talking with just the Captain?" He said as gently as he could.

She started. "Oh, no, I apologize. It is not your presence that is causing me distress. I am worried because this situation is my responsibility. I want to make things better. I do not know how to do that. I can not return to Ramlu."

"We have no intention of trying to talk you into returning to him. Neither the Captain nor I believe this situation is your responsibility. Your husband is acting by his own choice. He's the one who decided to place blame on our shoulders. It looks to us like you're just trying to take care of yourself, as best you can."

"But that's not what I've been told. It is the wife's place to make certain her husband is happy. Ramlu says this is absolute. He lets me know every day of our marriage. I only have moments when I don't believe. It was during one of those that I decided to leave. Now I'm just confused again. And you are in trouble."

Kathryn sat back, watching Chakotay bring her out slowly, calmly. She had no intention of interrupting.

"I can't discuss with you the basic tenets of your belief system. It's up to you to determine what you really think is right and true. I can only tell you what we see as outsiders, coming from a culture very different from your own. I'd like to encourage you to simply pay attention to what you're thinking and feeling during the moments, as you call them. Perhaps that will make things a bit clearer for you, whatever you decide to ultimately do. We only want to talk to you because you are the best expert on Ramlu, for lack of a better term." He smiled at her, hopefully sincerely.

"My friend and I were talking last night about those moments. She has them, too. It's almost as though we are looking at our lives through someone else's eyes. It can be a bit confusing on the one hand, and a bit claifying on the other. That's why I can't go back. I get too confused. Then there's my son to consider. Ramlu can be .... difficult."

"So have there been other times when he has gotten upset to this extent?"

"Just a few. He, being high praetor, prides himself on his lack of passionate reaction to situations. He forgets those times when he has acted out of anger."

"Has he ever gotten violent?"

"What do you mean?"

"Has he ever threatened anyone with physical harm? Or actually done harm to someone?"

She looked down at her hands, which had started to move again. "I don't think he has done harm of a physical sort. He has threatened."

Chakotay looked at Kathryn. He knew they were thinking the same thing. She nodded encouragingly to him. He really didn't want to ask the question but, steeling himself, he did.

"Has he threatened you or your son with physical harm?"

"Yes."

Well, now what, he thought. We've opened up this can of worms, what do we do with this information? He knew they couldn't encourage her to do anything.

"I'm sorry, Sidri. That must have been frightening. Do you think he is capable of doing harm?"

"I am not sure. I never thought so, but maybe that's because I always agreed with him, to smooth things over. Now I am not there, and he is out of control. Last night I thought that if he had a way to get onto your ship, he would attempt to hurt you both. I am so sorry."

"Don't worry about us. We have the means to defend ourselves. And if he comes after the Captain, he will have to answer to me. I don't think he knows enough about me to realize that would not be a good thing for him." His voice was getting a bit strident. He took a breath. "I apologize, Sidri. Now I am the one who's threatening."

"No, you're not. You are defending someone you care about. I know that neither you or the Captain will be the first one to take violent action. I snuck into his study and read what I could about your ship and your Federation. Knowing Ramlu, I'm sure he thinks that you will give in to whatever demands he makes. He is very shrewd when it comes to negotiating power for himself, and very intimidating. You just can't tell that from meeting him initially."

Kathryn was impressed with Sidri's insight. She was not stupid. She was also giving them a fairly good picture of the man. She wanted to ask a question.

"Sidri. Have you told any of this to Mr. Drkaya?"

"Some. He is also a man who holds power, and he works with my husband. I don't think he is a .... safe person to tell. Perhaps safe is not the correct word. He will not want to hear me, I hold no power."

"If he convinced you he was interested, would you tell him then?"

Sidri thought for a very long minute. "If there were someone I trusted with me, I could. So that there could be no question afterwards what was said." She thought a bit more. "I think I might know someone like that..."

"And if the Commander and I were to talk with Mr. Drkaya about this conversation, to see if he might be interested in talking to you, would that be all right with you?"

"Yes, I trust you. I don't really know why, but I do."

The door to the ready room beeped. Kathryn ordered it open. Tuvok walked in.

"Captain, the Council is here. I am on my way to the transporter room."

"Thank you, Tuvok, we'll leave the door open. Please tell Mr. Kim and Mr. Paris to contact me if they need anything. And we would like to speak with Mr. Drkaya before he returns to the surface."

"Very well, Captain. I will inform him." He turned and left. Chakotay got up to initialize the door open command once again, then returned to his chair. He had an idea.

"Sidri, can you think of anything else you'd like to tell us about your husband? Anything that will help us communicate with him more effectively?" He thought he knew what the answer would be.

"Not really."

"Well, then, are you hungry, by any chance?"

"Actually, yes."

"Captain, how about you?" He had a twinkle in his eye.

"Yes, Commander, I am. What do you have in mind?"

"I'll stay here on the bridge. Perhaps Sidri would be interested in meeting B'Elanna? The three of you could have a bite to eat in the mess hall while the Council watches the transmission. I dare say they will begin to discuss things afterwards, we can leave them in the briefing room for some privacy."

Kathryn grinned at him. "I think that sounds like an excellent suggestion." She tapped her chest.

"Janeway to Engineering. B'Elanna are you there?"

"Yes, Captain, just finishing up a slight calibration problem we're having with one of the gel packs. What can I do for you?"

"Sidri is here with me and we are heading to the mess hall for a bite to eat. Would you care to join us?"

They could hear B'Elanna smiling as she spoke. "Yes, I would like that very much. Give me another ten minutes. Torres out." Kathryn tapped her comm.

"So, Sidri, let's go take a walk." She stood and her companion followed. Kathryn took a moment in front of Chakotay to touch his chest and smile into his eyes. "You'll eat here? Use my desk. Replicate yourself something yummy, you deserve it." He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him, kissing the top of her head.

"Thank you. Have a good time." He beamed at her as she left. Sighing contentedly for no reason he could think of, he made himself some vegetable lasagne, a salad, and some tea and sat once more listening to the humming of the ship, his home. After he was done, he went to join Tom and Harry. They had an interesting discussion of what the perfect holodeck program would be. The briefing room door remained closed, though occasionally Chakotay could hear voices.

Alpha bridge shift was still on duty though it had been due for relief a half hour before. The Commander was waiting until the Council was done and ready to leave, he didn't want to explain the intricacies of the situation to beta shift. He would give Tom and Harry something extra for the overtime they had put in two nights ago and now again. Chuckling to himself, remembering Kathryn's promises for his own overtime pay, his mind was wandering to the possibilities...

"Commander, I'm picking up a small craft approaching from the surface, heading directly for us, bearing 8 by 4.3 mark 2."

"Open a channel. On screen."

"This is Commander Chakotay..." He stopped as the face of Ramlu appeared on screen. "High praetor. To what do we owe this pleasure?" He kept his voice neutral.

"Good eve-ning, Commander. I understand there are some people on board your ship that I know? I have been looking for them and need to discuss some urgent planetary business. May I come aboard for a short while to take care of that?"

"Excuse me a minute praetor. Harry, cut vocal feed." Beep. "Captain to the bridge."

"On my way."

"Tuvok to the bridge."

Tuvok came out of the briefing room directly to Chakotay.

"Tuvok, the high praetor is requesting to board. Have a security team ready in transporter room one. The Captain is on her way here."

"Understood." Tuvok headed for his station, calling for his best team to go to the transporter room.

"Commander Chakotay to the Captain."

"I'm almost at the lift, Chakotay. What's up?"

"Is Sidri with you?"

"Yes."

"Ramlu is on a craft off our starboard bow, requesting to board, wanting to speak to the council about urgent business. Before you enter the bridge, let me know and we'll cut visual contact with him. I suggest Sidri wait in the ready room until this is over."

"Understood. Janeway out."

"Harry, open full channel." Beep. "I apologize high praetor. I have contacted the Captain, who is on her way here so that your request can be dealt with. Until she arrives, is there a message you would like me to pass along to the council?"

"No, thank you Commander. I must speak to them personally."

"Janeway to Chakotay."

Chakotay turned to Harry, who nodded his head. The channel closed again.

"He's off screen." Chakotay told her.

The lift doors opened and a doe-eyed Sidri walked onto the bridge with Kathryn holding her elbow. She motioned to Tuvok, who immediately led Sidri to the ready room.

Kathryn stood next to Chakotay. "Report." She said quietly.

"He refused to pass a message. States he must speak to the council directly. I have no idea if he knows Sidri is here. Tuvok has his best security detail waiting in transporter room one. I told Ramlu you were on your way here to 'handle' his request. He is being polite, but maybe it's my imagination - there's an undercurrent of something..."

Tuvok returned to the bridge, the ready room doors closing behind him. Tom spoke up. "He's hiding something. No question. Snide under polite."

"Understood. Damn. Why can't he leave us the hell alone. Well, I can't think of a good reason to refuse him, not without inciting some other out of control action. At least here we can keep him under guard until he leaves again, and can always beam him off at a moment's notice. Tuvok, go meet the praetor. Chakotay, go tell the Council."

"I will, but then, Captain, I am not leaving your side." He stared intently into her eyes. After a moment, she nodded.

"All right, Commander, you're with me."

Tom chuckled. "Got that right, Captain." This brought out a much needed chortle from his Captain and his Commander, as well as others on the bridge.

"Thank you Tom. I'm happy I have your blessing. Harry, on screen once more."

Chakotay headed to the briefing room, Tuvok to transporter room one.

"Good evening high praetor. I understand you wish to come aboard Voyager to speak with your council. I think we can accomodate that request. I'm sure you'll understand that we will have you escorted at all times by our security detail. We, frankly, no longer consider you someone with whom we have friendly relations, given your last communication with us." Kathryn stood with her hands on her hips.

"Now, Captain, I was a bit upset this morning, and I apologize for my behavior. I only need to speak to the council. But if you feel it necessary to take precautions, I understand." He was smiling in a way that made Kathryn's hair stand on end.

"Fine. We will engage a tractor beam and hold your craft to our starboard side, then transport you aboard. You will be met by Lt. Commander Tuvok and two security officers. They will bring you to the council. Janeway out." She turned to Harry, who again nodded and cut the feed. "Harry, set up a tractor beam on him."

"Done, Captain."

"Janeway to Tuvok."

"Yes, Captain."

"Tuvok, he's ready to be beamed aboard. Scan him for weapons, if possible. The Commander and Mr. Paris are right. He's up to something. Bring him to the council. Have a transporter lock kept on him at all times."

"Understood. Tuvok out."

Kathryn sighed. "Mr. Paris, you will have the bridge, so to speak. We will all be in the briefing room, but I'll leave the door open."

"No problem, Captain." He turned to smile at her. Kathryn walked down the steps to the helm and patted him on the shoulder.

"Thanks, Tom, for the little joke back there. Gave you a good straight line, didn't I?"

"You folks always do. But seriously, Captain, good luck. Stick close by the Commander, would you? Don't want anything to happen to you, or him."

"Me neither, Tom, me neither." She got a strange look on her face. "If you don't mind me asking you, what is that aftershave you're wearing?"

Tom squirmed a bit. "Gee, Captain, the name just escapes me. I get it in the replicator, though, lots of us do. Common one." He turned back, intently focusing on his con.

"Captain to the briefing room."

"On my way, Commander." After one more sideways look at her pilot, she went through the side door.

"Tom, what was that all about? That aftershave costs you extra replicator rations every time you make another batch.

"Don't be mad Harry, but I can't say. If she asks you, give her the same answer, okay? I promised Chakotay -- long story. It would embarrass the Captain..."

Harry studied his friend. "For them I'll go along with it. But you owe me a better explanation at least, and maybe more..."

"Over dinner and a beer, later, if we ever get off work maybe I'll be more forthcoming. Just don't whine at me!"

"When do I whine?"

They were interrupted by the sound of the lift doors opening. Tom and Harry both turned to watch the procession. Tuvok walked next to Ramlu, the security detail right behind, hands on their phasers. The four went into the fray.

Sidri sat alone in the Captain's office. Restlessly she got up and paced. She had already looked with interest at all of the artwork, the sculpture, the plants. This was a nice office, she conceded, and these Voyager people were nice, too. They seemed to genuinely care about her. She just couldn't stay in here waiting for them to take care of her problems for her, however. Then she'd be acting just like Ramlu's wife again, passive, docile, compliant. Somehow she doubted that neither the captain nor that nice engineer, B'Elanna, would sit by while someone else fixed their problems. She wondered what would happen if she just walked toward the door, like Mr. Tuvok had done. Would it open for her, too?

The Kadi Council sat around the briefing room table, four on one side, three on the other, Mr. Drkaya near the head. The Captain and the Commander stood at the head of the table, side by side. Ramlu stood at the opposite end, with Tuvok and guards directly behind him. The tension in the room was almost palpable.

It was Drkaya who broke the silence. "High praetor, I must say we are surprised to see you here. I understand you have some urgent business to speak to us about."

"Yes, I do. However, I would like to speak to you alone, without the presence of the Captain and the Commander." He stared at them across the vast expanse. "This does not concern them."

"We would like them to stay. I'm sure you won't have a problem with that, just try and ignore their presence."

Ramlu's eyes turned into slits and his jaw began to clench and unclench. "Fine. Drkaya, Council members, I would like to explain my actions this morning. I understand you have been told of my communication with the Voyager crew..."

Drkaya interrupted him. "Why do you think that?"

"I still have friends close to you. Someone told me. Don't try to deny it, that is why you are here. Do you want to know my side?"

"This is the urgent planetary business you needed to talk to us about? Ramlu, I believe we, the Council, have talked enough. You will be relieved of your position, effective immediately."

Sidri was walking out the ready room door when Tom intercepted her.

"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but I think you are supposed to stay out of sight. Your husband is in there, wouldn't you rather not see him?"

Sidri merely looked at him and continued on her path towards the briefing room.

Ramlu's face had turned an unpleasant purple color. "You can't take my position away from me, you don't have that authority."

"Actually we do, we were granted special powers of dispensation just for this case. Now, if you will cooperate with Mr. Tuvok and allow him to return you to your ship..."

Just then Sidri walked into the room. Upon seeing her, Kathryn gasped, which caused Ramlu to turn. When he saw his wife he growled at her. "You! So you have been telling them tales about me. I knew you were here..." He made a small move in her direction. Sidri cried out in fear. Tuvok immediately stepped in between the two, which effectively blocked the security teams' view of Ramlu for a moment. He took full advantage of this and turned on a dime, heading for the Captain.

He actually managed to get his hands on her throat before Chakotay pulled him off, spun him around, and slammed him against the wall under the viewport. Ramlu sneered at him, "Come on, I know you want to kill me... Put your hands around my neck and squeeze the life out of me... It's your destiny..." His voice by now was barely a whisper.

Chakotay looked at the almost dead eyes staring at his, seeing the truth for the first time. "Yes, that's what you'd like isn't it? You want me to be the one to end your life, your own personal man from the underworld. Have you ever killed anyone, Ramlu? Not just threatened weaker people than you, but actually taken a life? You think you are so tough and intimidating... Well, I have killed someone with my bare hands and it most likely was my destiny. But I will never do it again. Unlike you, a coward who feeds on his hatred, who despises himself and the people around him in the name of piety, I truly saw the light." He let go of Ramlu with disgust but he didn't back off.

"This is now all about me, and the Captain, isn't it? Your life is in ruins, your wife has left with your son, your power has been stripped. And in your face is another strong, intelligent woman in control of a powerful starship. This woman has an equally strong man standing by her side who loves her passionately and a crew that would die for her. Which part is the worst? That I am subordinate to her, that I support her, or that we wouldn't get out of our bed last night to speak to you?" Chakotay's voice was dangerously deep and barely audible from five feet away.

Ramlu's face was siffused with red spots, his eyes mere slits. His mouth stayed shut.

"I didn't think you would be able to answer that, Ramlu. How about an apology? Do you think you can spit out an apology to the Captain and especially to your wife?"

"Apologize for what?" He hissed.

"Well, to your wife, an apology for threatening her with bodily injury. And come to think of it, an apology to her for threatening her son would be good, too. An apology to the Captain for locking her up, for spying on her, for spewing abuse at her and for laying your filthy hands on her." Chakotay's voice was now at louder than normal volume.

"None of those things are my fault. You know nothing about Sidri, or why she needed to be kept in line. And as for your Captain, no apology from me is going to keep her out of the underworld..."

"You truly are a coward, Ramlu. A scared weasel. You can't even take your own life." Chakotay finally turned away from him in total disgust. He met the eyes of Kathryn, grey-blue with unspoken turmoil. They softened to his. "Captain, what would you like to do with him?"

"Council, if you have no objection, Mr. Ramlu will be returned to his ship immediately."

Tuvok and the security team, now with a clear view of the ex-praetor, converged on him, phasers ready.

Drkaya spoke, his voice cracking slightly. "We have no objections."

The security detail led Ramlu out. Drkaya rose, followed by the council. He went over to Sidri who was huddled against the wall. "You come with us now. We need to talk about your future, where you're going to live..." He turned to Kathryn. "Captain, we'll leave now as well. I will contact you in the morning, if you still want to continue we will complete the transactions at that time."

"I see no reason to stop. I'll speak to you then."

"Captain to the bridge." Kathryn and Chakotay heard it from a place far away, their arms securely locked around each other shutting out everything. They wanted nothing more than to hold one another and be left completely alone.

"Come, Kathryn, let's get this over with. I need to contact beta shift and get those guys out there some relief. Then we can go to bed. Please."

She nodded and pulled away. "Mine tonight?"

"I don't care, I just want to be with you." He tapped his comm, "Computer, call beta shift duty roster to report. Command code Chakotay  lambda 5521."

"Beta shift duty roster contacted."

They walked out of the briefing room hand in hand.

"Report, Harry."

"Captain, I tracked praetor Ramlu's craft as it left. I thought I should keep an eye on it. It crashed on impact with the planet surface. There is no indication of life signs."

"Are you certain?"

"Yes, Captain."

"Did the reading indicate whether he was attempting to land?"

"Well, I don't believe so. There was no change in speed from the time he entered the atmosphere until he impacted. It looks as though he simply drove the ship right into the ground."

Chakotay reflexively tightened his grip on Kathryn's hand. She turned to look at him, almost afraid of what she'd see. Surprisingly there was no guilt or remorse in his eyes, merely the clear dark brown drawing her down into their depths.

"What are you thinking, Chakotay?"

"That I am amazed I feel no guilt. That he had more guts than I gave him credit for. That I am not sorry and that I hope Sidri and her son find some happiness. And that I probably screwed with the Prime Directive in a very big way. What are you thinking?"

"I'm glad he's dead. And I don't like to realize that about myself. I think he became almost the embodiment of evil. Which is pretty ironic, since he was insisting that description fit you and me. I'm also thinking what a mess this whole thing has been, and all because we needed to trade with them and I lost my pip..."

"The magical pip." He smiled at her, a relaxed easy smile.

She knew in her heart that he might have trouble later on in the night, but she would be there to help him ease his way past it. If she woke up from nightmares, he would hold her tightly until reality replaced the images in her mind. Kathryn felt a certain peace settle over her, one that had been building in the background of their lives over the past few days and even the past five years. Knowing that neither would be facing the journey without the other was a very good thing, indeed.

They heard the doors to the lift opening as the next shift came on duty, people talking, passing responsibilities and information, Harry and Tom saying good night to them. They answered automatically, with automatic smiles. Still hand in hand, they told Ensign Meyer to only call in the most dire of emergencies to which they received a sincere smile and promise. After saying good night to beta shift, they stepped into the lift and once more wrapped each other in an embrace.

If crewmembers were surprised to see their command team holding each other tightly walking down the corridors to the officer's quarters, they gave no indication. Kathryn and Chakotay merely smiled good nights to all they met, knowing in the back of their minds that by mid-day tomorrow their relationship would no longer be a secret. By unspoken agreement, they gave up the pretense. The family aboard Voyager would be made whole, starting at the top. Entering the Captain's quarters both felt they were home and headed to the bedroom where the rest of the night waited for them.

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